Post by Leslie Sarkany on Dec 17, 2022 20:00:25 GMT -5
The story of hurricane Lulu
The HMCS Yukon was on a Caribbean deployment. Mutt and Jeff were granted shore leave for 24 hours. The pair were truly delighted having been aboard ship for the last fortnight. Before leaving they were warned by their P1 that no bullshit would be tolerated and that if they got jammed up the XO would deal with them. With a smile and swagger the the two ship mates went ashore. Heading to the nearest bat they toasted to the navy, they toasted to the warm Caribbean sun, they toasted to the Virgin Mary!
Staggering down the street they came upon a brothel. Mutt looked at Jeff smiled, pointed towards a red door which they both staggered too. Entering into a lounge with red suggestive wallpaper of what was offered the "Madame" of the house approached the two stellar Canadian sailors. Looking directly into the eyes of each she asked in a sultry tone "What brings you two worldly seamen into my abode?"
Jeff was the first to sputter out a response saying" Like one of your lovely ladies to do the full Monty on me. How much love?"
"Well for 20 Yankie dollars I can send you to Mygo who will take you around the world."
"Yah so much ya " slurred Jeff!
"Off you go to room number 69." Jeff tripped up the stairs to get to room 69 in a three story building.
"What about you sailor. What tickles your fancy and can make your mast stand erect?"
Mutt reached into his pockets pulling out a mere $5 stating "What can I get for this?"
The Madame looked deep into his crossed eyes and in a voice so low only a passing snake could hear hissed out "That my young world traveler will get you a Hurricane Lulu."
Shaken stirred and a tad unsteady on his feet Mutt responded "Sold."
"You go up to room 13 and I'll send you Hurricane LUlu!"
Mutt was dumbfounded and crawled up to the first floor which only went to room number 12. In a daze filled with haze he made it to the next floor finding 13. Being beyond all sense of reason. caution and safety Mutt entered room 13, dropped his skivvies and laid on the worn mattress with the main mast fully upright. While laying there he reached into his pants and pulled out a flask of rum rations taking a deep gulp of the calming liquid while drooling.
Laying in his drool a knock came upon the door to which Mutt in great anticipation responded with five words, "Enter at your own risk!"
The door swung open and there much to his astonishment stood a naked lady who began blowing, blowing and blowing. Mutt in his haze asked the lady "What in the hell is that?"
The lady responded saying "This is the warm tropical wind that comes with Hurricane Lulu."
Immediately she started blowing and swaying with Mutt saying "Tell me it is not so?" The lady at the door continued blowing out air, while she began to sway side to side while at the same time stomping her feet.
"What in the halibut have I got myself into" slurred Mutt while Hurricane Lulu advanced towards the bed?
Hurricane Lulu the began swaying, blowing and stomping her feet, swaying whist spitting all over the place.
Oh my God what in carnation are you" spouted Mutt?
Hurricane Lulu responded, " That is the warm tropical wind causing the palm trees to sway with thunder creating in the rain."
Immediately Mutt jumped out of bed crawled to the door saying, "I'm getting back to my ship cause no one can have sex in this kind of weather and she might sink the ship."